El ¿Dónde coño estamos? Hash

Silver and I found ourselves in Mexico over the Valentines day weekend, and of course, my first thought was "Let's go hashing." Unfortunately for us, there was no hash within about 250 miles, and after much convincing, I agreed that was a bit far to go on a hash. Basically what that means is that our next trip will be planned around a hash, and not a wedding. I mean really, priorities!

So since there was no hash close by, we decided to host one ourselves. Now, when I say we decided to host our own, what I mean is we started haring a trail, however, didn't leave any flour or beer behind. Not knowing the local area, or the authorities (or even the language), we decided not to tempt fate, by disturbing the city. Luckily, there was no pack, so our lack of trail or beer went unnoticed. Some may refer to this trail as a simple walk through the town, however I will simply call those people closed minded.

Our goal was to make it out to the mountain ranges, and go on a nice hike through them. Unfortunately, the hotel refused to give us any advice or directions to a nice hiking spot, so we just went out, determined to find a nice trail on our own. We did eventually make it to what looked like the start of some very nice hills, however all of the trails we saw leading up it, looked like private driveways. Again, not wanted to push our luck, we decided it was probably best to just continue on down to the beach. Silver was very excited a little later to find a rooster wandering around the road. however, I was unable to let Silver feel proud of her accomplishment and decided to one-up her by spotting a tiger being hauled around in the back of truck. The driver was announcing something over a speaker system, which after seeing someone walk up and buy what looked like a ticket, I guessed was either a tiger meat buffet later in the evening, or a circus/zoo event.

The rest of our journey was rather uneventful, which was more or less good. We made our way back to the beach, at which point we wandered back to our hotel, crossing several rock formations which made the journey much more exciting. And like any good upon returning we circled up and had a drink. See below for some pictures.

Hangman & Fuzzy Butt Celebrate Hangman's 20 Year Separation from the USN

Apparently Silver and I need to come up with a hobby, because we were quickly convinced by Herpicles that our free time on Sunday could best be spent at another hash. As it turned out, he was just tired of being persecuted for being the only Jew, and wanted some backup. So after making our way out to the middle of no-where Chantilly, we got to meet this Hillbilly group, which was half made of up familiar hashers anyways.

So the trail was pretty fun and I was excited, as the snow on the ground promised to make this a thrilling adventure. The hares decided to use kool-aid in squirt bottles to mark the trail, which was surprisingly smart for any member of this group, let alone a hare. Unfortunately, that was only smart thing they did on trail. It was pretty nice going along the trail, running through the snow, and over frozen areas. I fell through at least twice, getting completely soaked feet, but since it was a nice day, it wasn't too bad. After the first mile, I started walking, and amazingly the trail was laid well enough to keep me up with the FRBs, which was fantastic.

We were promised a beer check at start, but after going several miles with no beer check, the trail was already looping dangerously close back to start. And what do you know, the trail looped back to start with no beer check to be found. The hares claimed they left the beer check at the top of a hill, and that some kids must have run off with it. Well, that's just idiotic. Everything was snow covered, and kids are clearly going to be climbing up hills to sled. So either the hares were just of it or some kids got to experience the deliciousness of Shlitz and PBR.

Rainblow lost her keys on trail, and so half of the group stayed behind to re-run part of the trail to look for them, and the other half went on to OnOnOn. Hangman was kind enough to have us over to his house for the OnOnOn, and after about 45 minutes the rest of the group showed up, unfortunately with no keys. After hearing some of the worst 'key' puns to ensure Rainblow felt as bad as possible, Silver and I bailed (a little before circle ended), as we had stuff to do in the 'Real World.'

The Adventures of the Misfit Hares Trail

Not too much to discuss this week. The trail was pretty good, a bit wet, and a big hilly, but overall, pretty fun. The trail ended well, with a giant loop, and Herpicles being ridiculed (again) for his giant vagina.

We did have two virgins show up, the first (name?) was a bit overachieving, and decided to play chicken with metal gate. Not-surprisingly the gate won, and our virgin left a little worse for wear. The second And How's Her Bush brought, and well, couldn't have fit in any better. After talking getting a nice analversary present for him (editable underwear), she proceeded to give us a boob check, and once she was kicked out of circle, decided to help me stay warm, by putting me in the middle of a humping sandwich. Both awkward and warm!

Silver and I bailed a little early from circle, as it was starting to get super cold. I don't if we'll make it out next week. The hash will have to be really convenient and close, as Lost starts, and honestly, I don't think waiting an extra 2 hours to watch it is an option